by Karen Martinez
How do you get your ex back even after you’ve cheated? Some people claim that an affair should always end a relationship. But I disagree. I believe that every relationship is savable if both parties really want to work on it. This article is about restoring trust in relationships.
Restoring trust in relationships requires an adjustment in attitude and actions. Even after an affair, it is possible to save a relationship. But that starts with ramping up the level of trust within the couple.
If you have had an affair, you have had an attitude which allowed you to stray. There may be something at the relationship’s core that is diseased. But you can heal the disease. What was it that you were looking for when you strayed? Was the sex humdrum? Was she too busy for you? Was she just not spending enough time on her grooming? You wouldn’t have had an affair if the primary relationship was perfect. So, what needs to be done to fix it? Often that lies in self analysis. But just as often, that lies in the couple’s relationship.
Restoring trust in relationships means fixing the underlying problems. Sometimes that means going into couples counseling. But just understanding our thoughts isn’t enough. The next step is to take concrete action in fixing the problems.
The secret to restoring trust in relationships lies not in talking about the right things, but in doing the right things.
One of the biggest things you can do is to make small promises and keep them. If you promise to take the trash out every evening, do it. And, do it consistently. When you demonstrate that you can be trusted in the small things, a gradual sense of confidence will be realized in the larger picture of the relationship.
Your girlfriend or wife is going to need constant reassurance that you have changed. This means that you are going to need to apologize more than once over time. You will also need to treat the recurring comments about the violation of trust as a matter of course. It is not easy for her to forgive the breach. If you want to stay with her, you will be patient with her.
This does not mean that you must feel guilty about the indiscretion forever. In fact, if you allow her to constantly guilt trip you, she will not be satisfied in the new relationship you are building. Just be understanding.
Finally, you need to put a positive spin on the incident. Treat it as an opportunity for both of you to grow as individuals and for the relationship to mature. Just as a bone grows stronger at the place it has been broken, a relationship can improve after an affair.
Restoring trust in a relationship takes time. It requires that you change both your attitudes and actions. But it is possible to heal the divide and be a stronger couple as a result.
You might want to check out “The Magic of Making Up” yourself. http://381949.makingup.hop.clickbank.net
What swell folks at Netflix!
Out of the goodness of their little hearts — and perhaps to stave off competitor services like those from iTunes — some months ago they started offering subscribers “free” movie video streaming that they call “Watch Instantly.”
For the first few months, it was a neat little service. Didn’t have time to wait for another movie to arrive in the mail? You were too tired to do anything else and decided at the last minute to watch a movie?
Sure, the selections weren’t always the most current, but the library was deep enough to keep even a movie buff like me at my computer screen.
Overwhelmed by their own success, Netflix’s servers are now overwhelmed. “Watch Instantly” used to mean “instantly,” i.e. the server checked your video connection and the movie started. Simple!
Not anymore. I’ve been keeping count. During the past three weeks I have tried to start a movie 178 times — often the same movie to see if I could get it to start streaming. ONLY ONCE in 178 tries did the movie start streaming the first time a tapped on that little blue “play” button. Wait times have ranged from four hours up to 6 days. In the screen capture above, it says I will have to wait 48 minutes before my selected movie starts to play. By then, I will have slashed my wrists, made obscene phone calls to former girlfriends, and probably write this blog.
And it’s gotten worse. Customers used to be able to reset that play button until they caught the Netflix server at the right moment and the movie started. It was a little like playing the lottery. Sometimes you won, usually you lost. But now Netflix has caught on to this little game and changed the rules. Try to reload the movie and you will get an error message that says you have two movies running, which is against Netflix policies. The only way out of this dead end is to close all your browsers and start over.
Keep in mind that a few weeks ago I went through an entire series of diagnostic routines with my PC and with my cable provider that proved beyond a doubt that my Internet connection was indeed fast enough — I run a top-of-the-line system here! The problem is clearly at the Netflix end.
Netflix used to be fun. When I slashed by cable TV connection, Netflix gave me access to great movies at a reasonable price. Now they are one of the scourges of my little world. Like one of Skinner’s rats, each time a movie fails to start, that’s one more shock to my furry head saying, “Don’t bother!” And I am beginning to think I won’t.
Netflix 1, Customers 0.
Tags: iTunes movies, movie streaming, movies, Netflix scam, Netflix watch instantly, server problems at Netflix
You did it! You finally built your home bar. But now comes the time to decide what to keep on hand so that you will be known as the perfect amateur bartender. If money is no object, simply go the nearest liquor store and buy one of everything. This option is not only expensive, but you would probably end up with more bottles than space to store them. A more sensible solution would be to pick and choose a selection of liquors, non-alcoholic beverages, tools and equipments and little extras to really impress your guests.
Liquors
* Gin * Vodka * Rum (light and dark) * Whiskey * Bourbon * Rye * Scotch * Irish Cream * Tequila * Brandy/Cognac * Wine * White * Red * Champagne or sparkling wine * Vermouth * Beer
Liqueurs
* Amaretto (almond) * Blue Curacao (orange) * Chambord (raspberry) * Cointreau / Grand Marnier / Triple Sec (orange) * Crème de banane * Crème de cacao * Crème de menthe * Frangelico (hazelnut) * Galliano (herbs) * Kalua (coffee) * Sambuca (anise) * Schnapps (various flavors) * Southen Comfort (peach) * Tia Maria (coffee)
Mixers
* Angosturas Bitters * Lemonade * Cola * Cream * Eggs * Ginger Ale * Grenadine * Milk * Orange Bitters * Sour Mix * Sprite/7-Up * Soda water and tonic water
Fruit Juices
* Apple * Cranberry * Grapefruit * Lemon * Lime * Orange * Pineapple * Tomato
Garnishes/Other
* Cinnamon * Ice * Maraschino Cherries * Nutmeg * Olives (black/green) * Salt/pepper/sugar * Sugar Syrup * Tabasco Sauce * Worcestershire Sauce
A few handy tools are necessary even for the new bartender. A well-stocked bar is more than just the bottles you have on hand. The right tools, displayed on your countertop will go a long way in impressing your guests and will also help making drinks that look like they were made by at professional bartender.
* Shakers
One of the first bar tools that you will need is a decent shaker. They are useful for building drinks, mixing them properly and transferring them into glasses not to mention they make a good show for your guests. Shakers come in two types: 1) Conventional ones with a cap and a built-in strainer and; 2) Boston shaker which is a large mixing glass with a scale in centiliters and ounces. You will need a strainer to go with the Boston shaker.
* Electric Blender
Anyone who likes margaritas, daiquiris and pina coladas needs an electric blender. Aim for a smaller model that will take as much space on your bar.
* Measuring devices
Jiggers and measuring spoons will help you make consistent drinks every time. It also prevents you from being to heavy handed on the booze. Remember that goal is to create a great tasting drink and not to get everyone drunk.
* Muddler
A muddler is a thick stick made out of wood or stainless steel that is used to mash ingredients such as fruits, sugar or mint into a glass when you just want to infuse the flavors into the drink without blending it to a pulp..
* Corkscrew and bottle opener * Cutting board * Citrus juicer * Ice bucket and ice tongs
Now that you know what to keep in your bar, all you need to learn is how to make great drinks your friends will love. There are numerous books available on the market from beginner bar setups all the way to experts and drink you never knew existed.. Buy one or two and have fun experimenting. Cheers!
About the Author – Stefan Hyross
Specializing in wine and bar accessories shop online for the perfect gift for the wine bar enthusiast. WineBarGifts.com in a wine accessories store that feature unique items and is your one stop shop for great gifts ideas.
Tags: alcoholic drinks, home bar, liquor, stocking home bar, wine and bar accessories
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